Cheap, Stubborn and Retired

My buddy and I went for coffee this morning and afterwards he had to get some banking done. I am cool with that because I like to people watch and banks attract all sorts of weird and wonderful people. We had gone to the same bank yesterday to get a money order in New Zealand dollars. Ken managed to get a teller that had only one or two functioning brain cells and it took her about a half hour. She tried to talk him into getting American funds because she had never done New Zealand money before. What a bonehead!

Speaking of boneheads, my buddy had the money order made with the wrong name which is why we were back at the bank again today. Now, as luck would have it my buddy got the same brain dead teller that he had yesterday, and we were there for about an hour. If she couldn’t figure out how to make the money order in the first place, you just know that cancelling one and getting a new one made would tax her to the limits. I didn’t mind waiting, as I said I love to watch people and I have a couple of books on my cell phone.

I noticed that at no time in that hour was there fewer than ten people waiting to see a teller. I would guess the average wait was twenty minutes to a half hour. That is just unacceptable! Why do we put up with this bullshit? I could maybe see it on a Thursday or Friday payday, but at 11:00 on a Tuesday morning? No! No! No!

Now, don’t get me wrong, the tellers are very nice people and they are very, very helpful. This particular bank was the Scotia bank, but my Royal bank and the TD/Canada Trust are the same and I have to assume that all financial institutions are the same now. It is painfully obvious that the banks want us to use online banking and the ATM’s so that they can charge us a service charge and not perform a service. The only service that you can get for free now, is if you actually go into the bank and have a teller do the work for you. Am I the only one that finds this to be backwards? It should cost more to use a teller shouldn’t it?

Today, it wasn’t as if there was a shortage of tellers, there were four regular tellers and two “Business” tellers. They just take so damned long with each and every customer. They are extremely helpful, very thorough and able to carry on a pleasant conversation while taking care of your banking needs. There is nothing to complain about and even though you have waited 30 minutes to see the teller, once at the wicket, everything is taken care of in the aforementioned professional manner. If you were to call the head office (if you could find a number) to complain about the wait, they would ask “Was the service you received to your satisfaction?” Of course it was, but that’s not the point! “Couldn’t you have used the ATM or our online banking service?”

“Maybe I could, but it is nice to talk to a real person.”

“Well sir, other people feel that way and there is often a crowd.”

I suspect that tellers are told to be very thorough and never to rush the customer. Spend as much time chatting and get the customer to swipe their cards as often as you can. They are killing us with kindness! Why would you wait in line for a half hour when you can get your money in seconds from the ATM? Better yet, use your debit card or one of the many charge cards that you own. That way you can pay the bank service charges or interest on your credit card account. BASTARDS!

Before ATM’s, online banking, automatic deposits and credit cards, you would have to go to the bank after work on payday, wait in line and get money for the week. Back then it would take the teller two or three minutes for each transaction. Isn’t it strange how with everything computerized it takes much longer now? I am thinking I should go to the bank once a week and take out the cash that I need for the week. That way, I wouldn’t have to pay service charges to the bank. Yes, it might take me an hour to get that money, but I am cheap, stubborn and retired!

The Royal bank made a profit of 7.5 billion for the year ending Oct. 30 2012. You can see why they need to up service charges.