Monday 13 August 2012

Maybe They Are Assholes


I shy away from the thorny issues in this blog for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I am just not that deep or complex. Secondly, I take a live and let live attitude towards other people. Well, I kind of have to since a jail term would be mandatory if you decided to kill every son of a bitch that deserved it. I don’t know where the blog will end up, I rarely do, but it is going to start with common courtesy or the lack there of.

When did it stop being the norm to hold a door for someone? I’m not talking about holding a door for women, you should always do that, but I’m talking about not letting a door slam in someone’s face. I will grant you that it isn’t always obvious whether you should hold the door or not, depending on how far away the person is and just how fast they are walking. If they are taking their sweet effing time then just go through the door and let the slow pokes get their own door. They need the exercise anyways probably. Of course that is not the case if the person in question is on crutches, is using a cane, has a baby in a carriage, is carrying parcels or just looks like they could use something positive in their day. Hold the door and smile when you are doing it!

DON’T SPIT YOUR FUCKING GUM ON THE SIDEWALK!!! I don’t know any other way to phrase that. Not only is it disgusting when you step on someone’s gum when it is half melted, but usually there is a garbage can nearby. I would rather see you swallow the gum and have your bowel get plugged up, eventually resulting in a very long and painful death. I will gladly pay my share of your medical and eventual funeral bill.

I saw a documentary recently on building cheap and efficient electric cars. I was amazed at how much thought and planning goes into the design of an automobile. Truly an amazing thing! There is nothing in that car that doesn’t need to be there; everything has a useful purpose and often dual or triple uses. With all of the thought that goes into the design, I am amazed at how often people decide not to use aspects of that design. I am talking about the signal lights. I’m not sure exactly when it was that I first noticed that a lot of people didn’t use the signals anymore, but I would bet you that it coincided with the advent of cell phones.

It is almost impossible to hold a phone to your ear with one hand, steer the car with the other and flick the signal switcher at the same time. Once you get into the habit of not using the signals, I suppose that it becomes a habit. I would like to see the cops pull people over and ticket them for unsafe lane changes. I tell you, if you are faced with a couple of $172 tickets, you will use your signals when you turn out of your driveway. There is no real worry about getting a ticket, because the cops are far more interested in watching people suspected of being in gangs than traffic infractions. Gangs are so much more glamorous.

Maybe these people are just very frugal and want to prolong the life of the bulb. Maybe they don’t know that modern cars use LED lights which have a lifespan of from between 25,000 and 100,000 hours. That is a lot of turn signals. Maybe these people feel they are performing a service to society in general by testing the reaction time of drivers following them. Maybe I am just unlucky and get behind people that don’t signal. Maybe my eyes are getting worse and I can’t see the signal lights. This is the one I think is most likely. Maybe they are assholes!

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