Sunday 8 May 2011

A Happy Life And Good Children

I guess that since it is Mother’s Day I should say something about mothers. My first instinct is to say that without fathers then mothers would be nothing. However, my survival instinct tells me that’s the wrong thing to say. Let’s see…uhhhh…Mother’s Day is very good for the card and flower business. I have the feeling that I am in a hole and pulling the dirt in after me. Good thing no one is reading this.

Louise heard from all of the kids today and even had a visit from Arwen and Ewan. Just a short visit, but it is always nice to see them. I never know what to do on mother’s day. I mean my mom passed away some time ago and if I bought candy for her everyone would know that it was really for me. Same goes for a card or jewelry. I don’t particularily like flowers because I feel that they are just mocking me. Nah! Nah! Nah! “Not only can we grow big and beautiful, but we look better dead than anything you can grow alive!”

Fucking Flowers!

I don’t need to put up with their shit even on Mother’s Day! Fucking flowers!

So, mom’s day…pretty cool for all of the moms out there. Sucks for the dads though. When the kids are small you have to do everything for them from breakfast in bed to buying the cards and gifts. You can’t go cheap either, because the moms know that it is really you buying the stuff and God help you if it isn’t appropriate. I don’t know about the other dads out there, but I wouldn’t recognize appropriate if it kicked me in the balls! I can remember asking a five year old if she thought that this is a good gift for mom. Never trust a five year old!

When the kids get to adult age you have to walk the tightrope and somehow drop the hint that it is Mother’s Day and they should do something special, without actually saying it. You don’t want them to think that you think that they don’t love their mother. God forbid! No matter what happens, I am the asshole. Good casting I guess.

I have never known what to do when the kids aren’t available. Do I take her out to dinner? Why should I foot the bill? Not my mom! Yeah, I know, it is totally wrong thinking. If someone knows, let me know for next year.

In a funny way, on Mother’s Day I am kind of glad that my mom has passed. No more pressure. I don’t have to worry about whether she would like the gift I sent to her. I know in my heart that she would love whatever I did send her. Mom’s are like that. I can remember one Mother’s Day when I made a crappy card at school and when I gave it to her she smiled and started to cry at the same time and she broke two ribs when she hugged me. That is when you know you are truly loved, when a half cent of paper and glue makes someone feel as if you gave them the crown jewels.

To all of the moms, I wish you a happy life and good children.

1 comment:

  1. Well you got out of that hole you were digging for yourself nicely at the end, I was wondering how you were going climb out! B