Friday 21 October 2011

I Don’t Like To Work Nights

There is magic in the air today!

I was up and out early this morning while the sun was still hitting the snooze button. I pulled out of the garage into a thick fog. It was the kind of fog that made me think that I could just make out the clatter of horse hooves on cobble stones and I half expected to see a hansom cab turn the corner through the fog up ahead. I passed someone on the sidewalk, and I could swear the he was wearing a cape and a deerstalker cap.

Oh, I also passed a few people scraping the ice fog off of their windshields. Not so magic for them I suppose. I was headed to the last day of work for a while, and I was looking forward to the day. Well, not all of the day because I had a dental appointment with the Lovely Dr. Julie to get the prep work done for a crown.

I was even three minutes early for work! We knew what we needed to do and just as we were about to begin, J.B. came over and told us that they had once again changed their minds and we would have to do everything all over...again! Perfect.

One good thing about a workplace that practices poor planning is that you are never without work. This part time job could take me to my death bed. We finished the rearranging just around coffee time. Was this good luck or good can be the judge? We made it back from Tim’s in time to stand around while those with the higher pay grade tried to make sense out of the floor plans. They looked just like squiggles to me, so I was less help than I usually am.

Just around this time, the bosses came over and told us that there was an error that needed to be rectified. I was racking my brain trying to figure out what I had screwed up and how this lot managed to know it was me.

Craig said “I understand that when you retired, you didn’t get a jacket. Even though you weren’t in my depot I am going to fix that error. Here you go, now stop whining!” It is true that I have often complained about not getting a jacket to my buddy Ken (who did get one when he retired) whenever he would wear his. One day Al wore his to work and that started the complaining all over again. Believe it or not, I was speechless! They weren’t tears of joy, it was just really dusty in the depot, no honest! I put on the jacket and shook everyone’s hand while babbling something about gratitude. I kind of felt bad about ducking out early from work about ten minutes later. I did have a dental appointment and I wasn’t hired as a mover. Not bad enough to return the jacket of course, but I did have a twinge of remorse. I mentioned that it was a magical day.

On the way to the dentist I broke the distracted driving law and ate some lunch and drank my tea. Stupid law! Dr. Julie is one smart cookie, she put enough stuff in my mouth so that I couldn’t talk. I just stared at the ceiling and the tiny, fine hairs that grow all over people which you can only see when they are backlit. I have had so much work done on my teeth, that I am beginning to be lulled to sleep by the sound of teeth being reshaped. I mentioned that I am getting a crown on my tooth, and just like a real crown it will be made of gold. Dr. Julie asked if I wanted gold, and I asked what my options were. Could I get platinum, magnesium, teflon or even wood? She said it was between gold and porcelain and porcelain isn’t very good for a molar. So I said “Well, I really don’t have an option do I? Make sure you put in enough gold so the kids can get something nice when I die.”

Hmmmm...What happens to your gold teeth and posts when you meet your maker? With the price of gold the way it is, grave robbing might be a pretty lucrative occupation.

Nah....I don’t like to work nights.

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