Friday 17 June 2011

Tea Bag Repair

I was just repairing a tea bag that had a hole in it with a stapler when it occurred to me that I have too much time on my hands. Not only do I have too much time, but I seem to be pissing it away. I mean really why would anyone fix a tea bag? Well, I suppose, because I can. Plus it will save a few pennies and, yes, I am that cheap.

However it does make me want to take stock of how I spend my time and whether or not I should institute a change. For a number of years now I have been using a push mower on the grass and hand clippers for the edging. The original reason that I bought the push mower was that the kids said the reason they wouldn’t cut the lawn is because they were afraid of the electric one. I really can’t remember if any of them have ever used a push mower on my lawn. No, no I am really sure that they haven’t. Last year I gave my spare mower to Brendan for his lawn and I assume that he uses it. I may be way off base on that one, and you know what they say about when you ass-u-me.

The push mower is just as fast as a power mower, so I am not wasting my time there. The hand clippers are another story. It would be much faster to use a weed whipper, but I guess that I am saving the planet and my waistline at the same time. Multi-tasking! There is another reason and it has to do with my old neighbour and his weed whipper. I watched him trying to repair the thing. He was back and forth from the yard to the garage time and again until I watched him smash it to pieces on the garage floor. Now, being a good neighbour I had to go and laugh at him and all he would say is that Craftsman is shit! When I offered to loan him my clippers he just closed the garage door and went inside. So, I guess if you factor in the multiple trips to different stores and cleanup of broken parts then I actually save time; sort of.

I will ride my bike whenever I can, because it saves the planet and my waistline. If you are just going a relatively short distance riding a bike is almost as quick as taking the old gas guzzler. The extra bonus is that if it happens to be rush hour you can piss off everyone that is parked on the road and just cruise past them. I know that they are pissed off because every now and then a door will open or horn will honk. “Hey buddy, get a bike!” I even had a bus pull over close to the curb so that I couldn’t get by! Dick! I rode around to the other side and asked him if being an asshole was part of the job description. He said a bad word and I told him that there are kids on the bus and to have a nice day. Now, of course I went up on the sidewalk when the light changed, my momma didn’t raise no fool. Well, she didn’t raise two fools.

Drinking coffee and visiting friends isn’t a waste of time. Just like a shark has to keep swimming or it will die, I need to keep talking and drinking coffee or I won’t talk or drink coffee. I had a job where the only person that I had to talk to was myself. I nearly went crazy! We wouldn’t want that, would we? Most of the rest of the time is taken up with dog walking and thinking. The dog walking is easy, but the thinking doesn’t always come easy, sometimes I need to rest my thinker and have a well earned nap.

The only other thing that takes time and really doesn’t accomplish anything is writing this blog. I wouldn’t wish to deprive the world of my wit and wisdom and I am sure you wouldn’t wish that either.

I suppose that some might think that it’s a life being wasted, but I would say it’s a life WELL wasted!

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