Wednesday 16 July 2014

Cooler Tomorrow


I was sitting outside, enjoying and hating the hot weather that we are having in Calgary today. It is supposed to get up to 32° or 33° today, but for us it is very, very, very hot. I know that in many other places around the world, someone would say “33°? That is cool weather, talk to us when you hit 50°C” All I can say to that is “BITE ME!”

I am lucky that Maegan is visiting and we have Hurricane and Tornado over during the days. I say lucky because having them over gives me an excuse to set up the kiddie pool. I would have set it up anyways, but now I have an excuse. We have all of the water guns out, a couple of new bought water canons and a second hand store bottle washer. I had picked up the bottle washer a few months ago when the only water around here was in bottles or falling from the sky as snowflakes. I knew what it was and was pretty anxious to use it, not for washing bottles; no one has a need to wash a lot of bottles in this day and age. Basically, it is a water pistol or a method to even the playing field between a seven year old and a four year old. Who knew it would be used against an old man?

I’ve never been fond of hot weather, because you can only take off so many clothes before they take you away. Yes, I know that if you live in a hot climate your blood will thin out and the hot weather will become more acceptable. Well, that’s the theory. I think people who are stuck in a hot, muggy climate just make the best of it and when those lucky enough to live in a cool climate complain about the heat, the poor bastards sweating their balls off come up with that drivel. I know its bullshit for anyone that lives in the hot and humid areas of Canada. It simply isn’t hot for long enough to melt the winter snow build up let alone thin blood.

I can believe that in areas of the world that have hot weather year round a persons blood may thin out. Over generations! Evolution isn’t known for speed. Skin will darken, sweat glands will grow and the people with tanned skin and large sweat glands will learn that nothing needs to be done fast enough to work up a sweat.

I am probably wrong; I usually am when it comes to anything scientific. Just ask Mr. Crawchuck from my grade 10 science class, he will agree with that. Today really wasn’t too bad. I took a dip, dried off, was sprayed with an array of water weapons and dried off. I drank cool drinks and there was nothing that needed to be done fast enough to work up a sweat.


Fuck…I hope its cooler tomorrow.

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