Monday, 6 February 2012

Danny Costescu

Today, Louise and I travelled up to Edmonton to say goodbye to her cousin Danny that passed away last week very suddenly doing what he loved to do. All in all, if you have to go that is probably the best way.

Louise has known Danny her entire life, and I of course met him through Louise. We got to know Danny when he lived with us, at a time in his life when he was at his lowest. When he left, he moved to Edmonton area and made a new life there. I think that he just wanted to put the part of his life that included us in the background of his memory. That's one of the reasons why we have only kept in touch through family for the past thirty years or so. No animosity, we were just ambivalent towards each other. We have always been interested on how his life was doing, and I hope that he was as interested in our lives.

We sat there listening to the stories of Danny and the kind of person that he was. How he brought love and laughter into the lives of those he touched. Like all of us he was a complicated combination of qualities and attributes. I wished that I had made the effort to know him better. The best part of any funeral is after the service in the reception when you can watch the people laugh and cry, sometimes at the same time, recalling the life that has been lost to us. Those “Remember when…” snippets of conversations can sum up a man’s life. He laughed, loved and made the world just a little bit better for his being here.

Like all funerals, it isn’t for the one that has passed, but for those that are left behind. To give thanks for knowing him and thanks that you are still alive. I tend to examine my life at funerals, holding it up for a closer scrutiny than I normally do. There are many things that I need to work on, but for now, I will say a prayer for those that are hurting because of Danny’s death and wish him a safe journey to wherever and whatever is out there.

Take care of yourself Danny!

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