Saturday 5 May 2012

Someone Paid Good Money For It

So, tonight is the night of the super moon. The way I think, is that the super moon is what I see in the mirror when I am getting into the shower. This super moon is supposed to look bigger than the regular moon and I am hoping that it would have flashing, rainbow colours and if the heavens are willing, a big red cape with a big “S” in the middle.

It is kind of a moot point in my neck of the woods, because although the snow/rain has stopped, we still have mostly cloud cover. I will step outside from time to time throughout the evening in the hopes of seeing the elusive “super” moon, but I fear that I will have to rely on others for photographic proof. To tell you the truth, I am now and have always been under whelmed by celestial phenomenon. (Does the word phenomenon remind you of this sesame street song? ) I guess the problem is that I am too used to seeing these things up close, thanks to National Geographic when I was younger and now thanks to the Hubble telescope. What I can see with my feet planted on the earth is at best a smudge on the night sky.

Now, having said that, I jumped at the chance to go out to the Superstore with Louise when she suggested a shopping trip just around dusk. Really, I can’t think of a better place to see the Super moon than at the Super store. I grabbed my camera and we drove towards the store. Of course there was nothing to be seen but clouds except for one little patch which didn’t have a moon of any kind, let alone a “Super” one. Oh well, the human condition is about disappointment.

When we got to the store, Louise grabbed a loonie for the cart and I grabbed our bins from the trunk to put our groceries in. I told Louise that in the other car I had a superstore coin which was made specifically for the carts. A few years ago you could buy these coins for some children’s charity, so that you would always have the coin for the carts. Louise looked at me and said “You bought a coin from Superstore for a children’s charity?”
Her attitude kind of hurt. It hurt all the more, because I didn’t actually buy the coin, I found it on the ground in the parking lot. “You don’t think that I like kids?” I replied with a hurt kind of inflection to my voice. I was hoping that she would drop the whole thing.

“When did you buy it? How much was it? Why haven’t I seen this magical coin before?” These were all very good questions that she asked, but I didn’t really have an answer that would bail me out.

I figured that I would try to deflect her attention with the moon and then push on into the store. “Hey, do you see the moon anywhere? What is it we need?”

Louise said “First we need a cart, why don’t you use your magic coin?”

“Okay, I didn’t actually buy the coin, but I do use it and that is kind of like supporting the charity. Well, I used it a couple of times.” Once, it got stuck and I had to pry it out of the slot with a nail that I had in the car. I think a few people thought I was stealing money from the cart.

This other time, I was just unloading the groceries in the car and a guy came up and offered me a loonie for the cart. Ahhhh…I have to take the cart back myself, it is a special coin. The guy looked at me Like I was an escapee from the mental hospital and asked “What’s so special about your loonie?”

“It is a special charity coin that I got from superstore.” Why does this dick care?

“Really, how much were they? Can you get them from the service desk?”

I mumbled something about not knowing and pushed the cart over to the coral. I pushed the chain thingy in the slot and the coin was stuck. I pulled the cart back to the car and got the same nail out, and started prying the coin out. The fucking guy watched me the whole time! I haven’t used that coin since, even though it is still in the car. I can’t get rid of it; someone paid good money for it.


  1. Wow, a loonie for a cart?! We only have quarter carts. Does that mean Albertans are rich and lazy or that Ontarians are broke and cheap?

    I had a clear 11th floor view of the moon by the CN Tower and it wasn't that fantastic. Someone was nice enough to send a blurry phone picture of it that showed up on the news for the people that didn't get to see it.

  2. We are rich and lazy out here. They tried quarters, but no one returned the carts and some of us found that one of those plastic bread closer thingys would work. Not me of course, but some other cheap slime balls.
    I am hoping to see the moon tonight, but I can't remember just where in the sky it should appear. If only there was some kind of a encyclopedia attached to a computer...