Chester Sold My Dolphin

I had a dream last night. No, not that kind of dream, although a dream like that would certainly be nice. I don’t often dream but am told that everyone dreams every night so I guess it would be more accurate to say that I don’t often remember my dreams.

No! I am not going to roll over like that anymore. I vowed to myself that I wouldn’t be pushed around this year and I am going to do the things that I want to do. That applies to not listening to the “theys” of the world. Generally my dreams are pretty emotionally charged and quite memorable. I have woken up so mad at people that I just won’t talk to them for a week at least. Yes, I know that it isn’t logical that my best friend rode my pet dolphin into the old west and left it with Chester from Gunsmoke, who in turn sold it to a Japanese restaurant that chopped it up and sold it as canned chicken. Disgusting!

I loved that dolphin and my buddy knew it. The trouble with getting angry about this is that even if you do confront him he would just laugh in your face and then you would be angry, embarrassed and stupid. Let’s just say that I seldom remember my dreams and it happens infrequently which is probably good for all of my interpersonal relationships. So, we put away this bullshit about dreaming every night and get on with my dream.

Like I said, I had a dream last night. It wasn’t about all men being equal regardless of the colour of their skin and heritage. That was a dream some other guy had and it was “I have a dream”. I made the same mistake thinking it was”I had a dream.” You learn something every day. In my dream I was in an office and the phone rang. I was with three or four people and for some reason there was a unicorn sitting in the corner chain smoking Tiparillos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zDGzd2HcEpo ) but he didn’t really have anything to do with the dream. My mother picked the phone up and said “Let’s put it on speaker”.

Then she slid the bottom of the phone forwards and flipped the top over and twisted it to the right, the sides pulled out and the handheld phone changed into a desktop phone and she pressed a button. That is when I woke up. Now, as I said I don’t often remember my dreams, but when I do, I hope that they would be more interesting that the one last night. It was a phone that transformed into a phone. Big freakin’ deal! My kids had Transformers and I have seen the movies, some everyday object changes into a robot that fights the forces of evil or in a worst case scenario, is the force of evil. It changed into a phone!

I wonder what the dream books would make of this. I can see the write up now, “You live a dreary, boring, hopeless life with no chance of excitement.” The only up side would be that at least I am getting calls. Well, at least I wasn’t mad at anyone and no one sold my pet dolphin as canned chicken.

Every day is a blessing I guess.