Friday 15 November 2013

Malignant Spirits

I just had a frustrating couple of hours. Most of the time when I get frustrated, it’s because I am doing something you would consider stupid and I was doing it incorrectly. This time however, I was trying to do a very simple fix, well what I thought should be a very simple fix that morphed into an elaborate production that saw wall hangings fall to the ground, tools manufactured and the use of language that would make Mayor Rob Ford blush.
It began simply enough with my closing the vertical blinds in the living room. Well, I would have closed the blinds if something wasn’t wrong. I tried to close them and when they didn’t close I gave Buster one of those looks that said “I know that somehow you managed to bugger up the blinds even though you don’t have thumbs!” He hopped off of the love seat, turned his ass towards me and left the room. I perched on the arm of the love seat and tried to see what the problem was. It seems to be that Gordian knot that the pull cords have become might be the problem.
I untangled the knot and it seems that the knot wasn’t the problem after all. I fetched a flashlight so I could see inside the track and pushed my head against the wall. Shit! The cord somehow came off of the pulley, but that shouldn’t be a tough fix. I’m still saying the same thing two hours later; it shouldn’t have been a tough fix. Shouldn’t, but was!

I’m not going to bother you with all of the ins and outs, suffice to say that for some reason I still can’t understand, the cord just didn’t want to go over the pulley. I suspect there was a lip of some kind that I never did see which blocked the cord. I fell off of the stool a couple of times, but lucky for me I was right beside the couch and love seat. Wouldn’t you know my vertigo would pick this time to act up? I finally managed to get both pull cords over the pulleys and wouldn’t you know it…I crossed the cords.


I would have thought the cords would come off of the pulley pretty easy, after all, sometime this afternoon it came off without any help at all. Not even close! It took about ten minutes and a considerable amount of swearing to get the damned cords free. I took a five minute break and tried to stare down the blinds without much success. I blinked first! I had the cords back in the right place in another twenty minutes or so, and they worked just fine as if there had never been anything wrong at all. Harrumph!

I put everything back where it belonged and the tiny tools I manufactured out of wire and metal I will save in the toolbox for when this happens again. It will happen again because I am convinced that the blinds are possessed by some malignant spirits. I suppose it might be that they are old and need replacing or I was doing something stupid and incorrectly. NO…I can’t accept that…malignant spirits it is.

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