Monday, 4 November 2013

Karma and Toenail Clippings


I was just marvelling about how wonderful it is to be middle class in North America. I have enough money for food, housing and entertainment and have had for my entire life. Do I feel for those that don’t have the means to supply their needs? Of course I do, but I am not evolved enough to take responsibility for the Karma other people have earned.

I am sitting at my personal window to the world in a heated house with a full belly. I don’t have to walk miles for water or rely on charity from other countries for my food. I must have been something of a saint in a past life to have earned this kind of existence. I was probably just a really good guy and not a saint, because I am sure the saints would have a larger house, a nicer car and perhaps a vacation home in Hawaii.

I can’t help but wonder if Karma is going to fuck me over in my next life, since I have it so good right now. Maybe that’s how things work; you have a crappy life and are then rewarded with a pretty good life which is followed by another crappy life. This could and quite possibly does go on forever. There isn’t a lot I can do about it, so I am just going to sit back and enjoy the ride.

Who knows, perhaps I have been good enough in this life to have earned another good life. I suppose that it is possible that goodness is cumulative and I am all done with the crap lives and from now on things will just keep improving. That works for me. I don’t suppose that is the kind of thing that someone in the middle of a shit existence wants to hear. Sorry!

I did start this with the intention of talking about over the counter drugs. You see I have just taken a couple of ibuprofen, two vitamin D and a muscle and back pain pill. The vitamin D is something the doctor wants me to take and the ibuprofen and back pills are of my own choosing. For some bizarre reason, it feels like someone is sticking a paring knife just under my right shoulder blade. I haven’t done anything physical to warrant something like that, and as I mentioned earlier it can’t be payback for an evil past life since I am in the reward life right now.

There is a remote possibility that I have angered some practitioner of Voodoo. I haven’t been to Haiti or New Orleans and I am pretty sure I would remember giving the finger to a voodoo queen on the highway. There might be a little doll out there made with a lock of my hair or some random toenail clipping, that has a hat pin stuck in the back, but why would they waste time on me. It would be so much more satisfying to stick a pin in the CEO of any bank or the guy you buy your losing lottery tickets from.

The back pain pills are pretty definite about my not operating heavy machinery. You know, I wouldn’t even have thought to drive heavy machines until I read the warning of the pill bottle. Now I would do almost anything to get my hands on a Bobcat, tank or even a smallish helicopter. It is coming on rush hour, maybe I should just get in the car and go for a leisurely drive around the city at ten or fifteen KPH below the speed limit and see what damage I can do. That could be fun!


Maybe I will just have a nap…

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