Sunday 16 June 2013

Rolfe


Once again I find myself wanting to do anything but write this blog. It seems to be happening more and more often, doesn’t it?


Oh well. I was thinking about my grandfather today. I suppose that it was because it is Fathers Day which got me to thinking about my father which got me to thinking about his father. I never knew my grandfather Rolfe, but by all accounts he was either a cowardly mama’s boy or a real bastard. I’m not sure which I would prefer. I suppose that I would prefer he was a nice guy that has just gotten a bad rap.


I never knew him as I said, but he treated my grandmother badly and as far as I was concerned that earns him a place in my better off dead book. He was a good looking man and I am sure that he was a product of his time. I have the feeling that his family felt that he married beneath his station and even after they were married he allowed his family to make decisions for him in regards to his wife and children. I only heard rumours of him taking vacations with his family, leaving Gram to look after the children and home while he was gone. Men of that time did little around the house anyways, so I imagine it wasn’t too much more difficult for Gram whether he was there or not.

I suppose that the problem was that you fall in love with someone and after a relatively short time they don’t seem to love you any more. It must be a horrible feeling! Grandfather Rolfe died pretty early on in life and I have always thought that Gram had the intestinal fortitude and the can do attitude to have helped him into his grave. Nothing was ever said, but she was completely cut off from his family with her three kids when Rolfe died. She came from a line of strong women; her mother raised eight children by herself after her husband died in a harbour accident.

Gram did marry again, to a man who gave her his last name and I know even less about him than I do about my grandfather. I have the feeling he was a banker (just a feeling, no real facts), and he might have helped a widowed woman with three kids to buy a house. I do know he died early as well, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Gram helped him along as well. Gram did not have a fondness for men in general, although I think she liked me well enough. Well, I am here and healthy, so I suppose she liked me.



I do kind of wish that I had known Rolfe, I kind of wish that I had known either of my grand fathers. It would have been nice to have an old guy spoiling me rotten and to see my dad spending time with his dad. I guess I will have to settle with having a dad that loved me and tried to make my life a little better than his was. My kids had a couple of wonderful grandfathers and good memories of them. It’s important to know where you came from so that you will know that place when you get there yourself.


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