Tuesday, 2 June 2015

Wait Till Next Christmas

I don’t know if this “social media” is just a passing fad or if I should embrace it as the new norm.

I know that I don’t use it to the full potential, but I guess I could say that about almost everything I do. Maybe it is just today, but everything is beginning to repeat. The jokes keep circling around every few weeks, the “news” is the same “news” I read last year. I have seen so many cute baby videos I think I just may puke. We all know that only my grandkids are worth looking at. I’ve seen the same amber alert five times now and I suspect the kid would be about 45 by now.

The only thing that is helpful for me is the birthday notifications. Since I joined Facebook I haven’t missed anyone’s birthday. Of course I am reminded about the birthdays of casual acquaintances as well. I wish them happy birthday, but to tell the truth I don’t care if they have a happy birthday or not. I hope that they aren’t hinging a good day on my best wishes, that’s far too much pressure for me to take on. I have a hard time having a good time on my own birthday, the way I feel it should be every man for himself.

Generally, don’t care what you are doing for every minute of every day. I don’t care if you had a shitty sleep, I don’t care that the guy on the bus smells of fish the first thing in the morning. I don’t care how your sports team did, unless it happens to be my sports team as well, then YAY!!! I really don’t care how much you love your husband or wife, you should love them, or there is a bigger problem than facebook in your future. I am sick of seeing those “if you have a beautiful, intelligent daughter then like this post”. No, my daughter is a hideous moron that should have been tossed in a dungeon the day she was born. If you would like to wish her a Happy Birthday, just “friend” her on Facebook.

Most of the “helpful” tips on Facebook end up just pissing me off. There was one that said if I mixed baking powder, vinegar and eye of newt into a paste it would restore my baking pans to a pristine condition. All that it did was to gunk up the cookie tin and caused me to wash an otherwise clean pan. Sure, there is the odd recipe that is kind of good, but I can just Google a recipe and end up with 183,291 slightly different recipes for the same thing.

I have a friend that just stopped going on Facebook and she seems to be okay. Granted, we now only communicate by card at Christmas, but that seems to be enough for that relationship. I don’t know that all is well with her, but I assume so since I haven’t heard anything to the contrary. Perhaps I haven’t heard because there is something wrong. Maybe I should write a letter, send an email or re-friend her on Facebook.


Screw it! I’ll wait till next Christmas and then worry.

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