Wednesday 29 April 2015

Body Odor and Farm Animals


So, here I am down in the pit trying to come up with another blog before I have to get my tired ass off to bed.
 
If this were one of those Medieval castles this would be where I would entomb older brothers, outspoken clergy, unwanted wives, poachers and any enemies that were foolish enough to have been captured alive. I would have dark cells that people are tossed into and never again see the light of day. I would have my armory down here and I guess the next level up, my men at arms would have their barracks. Behind a fireplace there would be a secret door that only I knew about where I would keep the family gold. There would be storerooms for the more mundane needs of everyday life and of course a secret escape tunnel for when the castle would inevitably be invaded. Such was life in medieval times.
 
In modern day, I have a couple of bedrooms where the kids lived in moderate seclusion. Now they double as a guest room, a sewing room, a workroom, a wannabe bathroom, a storage room and an unfinished rec room. Every now and then I tidy the basement up, but the grandkids just love to hang out down here and it is nearly impossible to keep clean. Well, impossible for me. I have good intentions this summer to get the place into a more useable state, but if I were a betting man…

The reason I am down here is that we are having some company drop in for an evening tomorrow on their way to a family get together on Vancouver Island. A stop over in Calgary was the best price for flights and we are looking forward to even a short visit. We normally have the big queen sized bed down here and the bedroom upstairs have the beds for Hurricane and Tornado. We just thought that Kathy would probably rather not spend the night in the pit. Who knows, in a past life she may have spent some time in a dungeon? Knowing her, there is a better than average chance she ended her life in chains. No one wants to relive that kind of experience.
 
So, we have spent some time tidying and getting the house to a state where it looks lived in by humans, not farm animals. The big push is on for tomorrow, but it shouldn’t be too bad. The upside to a messy house is that no one wants to come back a second time. The down side of course is that it is messy and those that you want to come back a second time won’t. 

Life is too complicated. It was much easier in the Middle Ages when people did what you wanted them to do out of fear or greed. There were horrible diseases of course; universal ignorance and everything smelled of body odor and farm animals. 
 

Come to think of it, that is what I have been smelling since I have been down here.  

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