Monday 14 March 2016

The Naughty List

I have mentioned many times that I am a big fan of all things Christmas. I don’t consider myself a whack job, but some others might. I’m too cheap to go really Christmas Crazy, but God help me if I ever win a lottery.

Every year when Christmas is packed away for the year we like to leave some small decoration out as a reminder that in not too many months it will once again be time to decorate the house for Saint Nick. The tradition started a number of years ago by accident when we simply forgot to pack something away and when we did notice it, it blended in with the décor. Can “mess” be décor?

Last year I left a countdown to Christmas ornament out, thinking that it would be kind of cool to be able to look at it and know just how many days are left until Christmas. I didn’t understand that someone would have to change the damned thing every day. I was pretty good for day 342 and day 341, but after that weeks and months would go by without an adjustment. More than 25 days is just too much. That is something that the sellers of Advent Calendars seem to have worked out a long time ago.
This year, we decided to leave out a pair of Santa and Mrs. Claus salt and pepper shakers. Santa is kissing Mrs. Claus on the cheek and they are held together with tiny magnets. It makes sense, because they are both useful and Christmassy.

Last night, Mrs. Claus fell over at dinner (possibly drunk) and the magnet in her cheek fell out. We finished dinner and I took Mrs. Claus down to the workroom to glue the magnet back in. I wouldn’t want to keep the Clauses apart for very long. Just a dab of cyanoacrylate glue and the love affair was back on.

Well, I thought so anyways. I learned about magnets in the fourth grade and have been fascinated by them ever since. Hurricane, Tornado and Tsunami all have played with our fridge magnets at some point in their lives, after all, that is what they are for. As you well know and as I should have known, magnets have positive and negative polarity, + and – will attract each other and like polarity will repel each other.
I now have Santa and Mrs. Claus salt and pepper shakers that will not kiss each other. I think I have split up the Claus’s; certainly their sex life will never be the same.

I am going to be on the Naughty List this year…

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