Thursday 27 June 2019

Goodish Years

I was watching a Youtube video the other day about how people in medieval times kept themselves clean. Of course the wealthy had soap which had been around in various forms since at least 2300 BCE. The rest of the unwashed masses (you and me) had to find another way because they didn’t have the money that the rich had to waste on soap. When you got dirty, you would wipe your hands on grass or rinse them in a puddle or stream if one were handy. You would never wipe your hands on your clothes because they were even harder to clean than your hands.

The guy in the video figured that if you had grease on your hands you would have to wet your hands and pick up some ashes from a fire which would cut thru the grease. Of course you had to be quick because water and ash would create lye which would give you a fairly serious chemical burn if left on too long.
 Image result for baby crying in tub
The video reminded me of when I was a little guy having a bath and got soap in my eyes. It felt like I had rubbed ash or burning coals in my eyes! I cried and rubbed my eyes which of course put more soap into them making me cry even more. Johnson and Johnson came out with a baby shampoo in 1953 (a year after I was born) but I doubt that mom and dad would splurge on that in spite of my tears. I would just have to learn to keep my eyes closed when there was soap on my head or a potential of soap on my head.

1955 shampoo add

I have been pretty good about keeping my eyes closed while washing my hair for six and a half decades or so. Those early lessons I learned the hard way stuck with me and for the most part I haven’t spent a lot of time crying in the shower. I suspect that some people that have spent time with me may have felt it hard to cleanse the thought of me away and let hot water wash the imagined dirt down the drain.

I have been pretty good until a week or so ago when for some reason I opened my eyes while I was washing my hair. I am aware that there are many more painful things that can happen to you, but at that moment I couldn’t think of a one. My first thought was that I had been struck blind by God for some real or imagined sin. It was possible that the guy who put chemicals into the city water supply made a horrible mistake or decided to use the water supply for a terrorist attack on Calgary. I know that the Joker did something like this in one of the Batman movies, but I am a long way from Gotham. No, just plain old shampoo and a naked old man that forgot the lesson he learned over sixty years earlier.

It might be time to try baby shampoo. I have thinning hair, not as many teeth as I once had, I am probably on the way to wearing adult diapers and I wouldn’t mind smelling like a baby. I still have a few good years left or at least goodish years anyways.

1 comment:

  1. Not as painful as the old zipper trick, but it does hurt like hell for sure!